初恋

好像每个人都有刻骨铭心的初恋吧? 不然为何有电影会不断地以学生时代的初恋为题材，而那些电影也都会卖座，还不断被人们讨论?

你的初恋是怎样的呢?

看了"我的少女时代"后，我的结论是: 大部分人的初恋应该都是无疾而终的。不是因为误会而分开，就是因为误解而失去联络。电影都是这样演的。那些电影会卖座，一定是得到许多人的共鸣。不同的是，电影的结局可以是多年后又重逢，男女主角可以藕断丝连。现实生活要再见谈何容易?

再比较 "那些年" 和 "少女时代", 我也总结以下几点:

1) 男生都爱校花

2) 女生在学生时代都像丑小鸭

3) 女生暗恋的男生都暗恋校花

4) 男生学生时代都自认为自己是最帅的 (其实不只在学生时代啦)

5) 女生学生时代时都会为自己喜欢的男生努力变漂亮 (其实不只在学生时代啦)

6) 女生最后都会喜欢坏坏的男生

7) 男生都会因为要耍帅而被视为幼稚最后变误会然后分开

8) 女生都会因为矜持所以变成误会然后分开

9) 那年大家都觉得自己的初恋是最惊天动地的事

我有初恋，也曾经年少轻狂过。看了许多有关初恋的电影，笑过，哭过，感动过。可是看了那么多初恋的电影后，发现大家都一样，还是我老了，突然觉得我的初恋也变得不特别了，不怎么样了。。

所以在独处的时候，自己唱着"匆匆那年"

匆匆那年 我们究竟说了几遍 再见之后再拖延

可惜谁有没有爱过 不是一场七情上面的雄辩
匆匆那年 我们一时匆忙撂下 难以承受的诺言
只有等别人兑现

不怪那吻痕 还没积累成茧
拥抱着冬眠 也没能羽化再成仙
不怪这一段情 没空反复再排练
是岁月宽容 恩赐反悔的时间

如果再见不能红着眼 是否还能红著脸
就像那年匆促 刻下永远一起 那样美丽的谣言
如果过去还值得眷恋 别太快冰释前嫌
谁甘心就这样 彼此无挂也无牵
我们要互相亏欠 要不然凭何怀缅

匆匆那年 我们见过太少世面 只爱看同一张脸
那么莫名其妙 那么讨人欢喜 闹起来又太讨厌
相爱那年活该匆匆 因为我们不懂 顽固的诺言
只是分手的前言

不怪那天太冷 泪滴水成冰
春风也一样 没吹进凝固的照片
不怪每一个人 没能完整爱一遍
是岁月善意 落下残缺的悬念

如果再见不能红着眼 是否还能红著脸
就像那年匆促 刻下永远一起 那样美丽的谣言
如果过去还值得眷恋 别太快冰释前嫌
谁甘心就这样 彼此无挂也无牵

如果再见不能红着眼 是否还能红著脸
就像那年匆促 刻下永远一起 那样美丽的谣言
如果过去还值得眷恋 别太快冰释前嫌
谁甘心就这样 彼此无挂也无牵
我们要互相亏欠 我们要藕断丝连

#GE2015

I can't sleep despite taken drowsy  medicine for my cough and flu... Because I am angry ...

1) I couldn't vote this coming election. a trip was planned way in advance before they decided to have polling day on a Friday ! Why Friday ? If they have it on Saturday as usual, I would be able to vote !

2) I felt betrayed.

Fengshan is carved out from East Coast GRC to be a SMC this time. My house is at fengshan smc for this election, Mr Raymond Lim was my MP. MR Raymond Lim used to be our transport minister, who basically did nothing worth mentioning , except to increase the number of platform to 5 from 3 at jurong east mrt station... And I just found out he did not even speak at all in Parliament for the past 4 years http://themiddleground.sg/2015/08/12/tmg-exclusive-speaking-truth-parliament/

Now, Mr Lim , 59 years old, is retiring as MP in this election. No matter how the media paint the story, I see it as he 输不起。 59 is too young to retire isn't it?.

Ok, fine.. He is probably disheartened.. Just because he was the transport minister, he's blamed.. Look at Mr Lui Tuck Yew, despite being on the ground, working so hard to serve the public, he is still blamed, scolded , and even mocked by the public...  I respect Mr Lim's decision to "retire" .. But I would expect PAP to field someone 厉害, they wouldn't want to lose another seat to WP right？ when I saw the list, the PAP candidate is Cheryl Chan.. Who is she?

Ok, maybe I am not involved in the pap grassroot thingy, so I dunno her.. Then I look at WP's candidate, is Dennis Tan... Huh.. Who is he ? Googled him, nothing came out. He was mentioned in the list of new WP candidates, but not interviewed, no quotes from him.. Nothing. He is not one of the featured WP candidates.

So I imagined, PAP strategy is "carve out Fengshan, so WP will have to field a strong, or known candidate in a SMC, so East Coast GRC team will not be so strong, we will have a higher chance to win". WP strategy to counter "we knew you would rather us have one more seat only, so we will do the opposite and make a bet! Field the strongest team we can manage to form in East Coast GRC, and a equally nobody in Fengshan. Voters will decide if they like WP more or PAP more!" 渺小的我。。(not that I get to vote... But still 不爽that we are not cherished by either party)

Maybe I dunno the candidates ... It might be too early to say they are not capable or what.. Ok, We shall see...

3) there are many weird ppl running for election.. What is Roy Nygren and Han Hui Hui doing as candidates ? There are also many ppl blindly supporting oppositions.. Supporting the pension funds, min wage, and all the what-have-not-socialist policies which might be detrimental to Sg economy... I do agree that policies have to be made with Singaporean in mind, not money.. But do we have to be so extreme ??

Policies that please the crowd may not be really beneficial policies for Singaporeans ... I certainly hope opposition parties do not promise these policies just to win votes...

4) many post on fb, something like "we must be appreciative of what pap did. Sg is in a better state compared to many other countries. Opposition party dun expect to form govt, why vote them in? APEHTC cannot even manage the town council fund properly, how to manage a govt ?This sort of blind support for pap..

What pap did right in the past does not mean that they will always be right, right ? Opposition party dun expect to form govt , doesn't mean that they cannot right ? Even Raymond Lim can be transport minister, why say eg. Chen Show Mao cannot ? He is probably equally experienced and educated, isn't he  ?  Is it wrong to have a realistic goal ?

It is never a level playing ground for the oppositions. Will Straits Times ever report how many of PAP MP  own or is related to companies that profited from govt projects ? Were any of our ministry or pap town council scrutinized like how APEHTC is scrutinized ? Is it fair to make a judgement base on what govt-controlled media reports?

XL ask me.. Why am I so upset, I won't be voting anyway... My ans is, precisely because I won't get to vote, so I am upset... I am upset that "my voice will not be heard" this time round... And I am not willing to pay a few hundred dollars and forfeit a few hundred dollars paid to change the dates for the coming trip just for "my voice to be heard". -- Irony of a true Singaporean

Why I think Straits times is wrong - How should you invest if you have 20k

My friend shared this link to me this Morning. http://www.bigfatpurse.com/2015/07/how-to-invest-if-you-have-20k-or-more-why-we-think-the-straits-times-is-wrong

You can find the link to the original straits times article in the above article.

Summary (If you are too lazy to read)
Strait Times consulted a few experts, they recommended invest 100% in unit trust if you have $20,000.
Bigfatpurse says unit trust is too expensive so should invest in cheaper ETF.

My view
"Would you pay someone so you can clean your room yourself?"

Buying ETF is exactly that.

Can ETF help you to decide which country is worth to invest more in?
Can ETF help you decide whether it is a better time to invest in high yield bond or government bond?
Can ETF do currency hedge so you invest in a country with potential growth but not risk in currency depreciation?

Just to list some example to show why we cannot compare ETF with unit trust.

You may say some ETF performed better than some unit trust. So this goes back to the first question, who is doing the work?

Because we all know investment returns are not guaranteed, past performance does not represent future performance ... would you have known which country, which stock will do best tommorow? Do you have market information to do analysis and make the analysis?  If your answer is yes to both questions, you are savvy you can DIY your own investment portfolio , you should probably invest in that few stocks you are convinced with (instead of just buy ETF which most probably include some stocks that you will not like) . If your answer is NO , then it's probably better to leave with the experts. While experts may make mistakes too ( nobody can have the crystal ball to know exactly what will " win" so there is always risk in investment), but the probability of going very wrong is much lesser than a blind bet.

So, Who are the experts?

This is where I disagree with StraitsTimes.
Consult your Financial Adviser if you have idle $20,000 in bank.
(Financial Adviser is not someone from a bank or an insurance company, find someone professional, who can really do a comprehensive analysis and give a comprehensive recommendation for you)

Because a real Financial adviser will discuss your ST, MT, LT financial goals, will look through your existing portfolio , will help you manage your risk , will map a financial blue print to reach your financial goals. Then will advise what you should do to your idle money best suited to your financial situations.

Maybe it's better to save in bank because you have to pay for your wedding next year?
Maybe it's better to pay off your personal loan so you do not have to pay 20 +% interest?
Maybe it's better to put into SRS to save tax?
Maybe its better to go into endowment ?

Or at least, an adviser who can recommend a portfolio or strategy better than just buying ETF.

Summary of my view (If you are too lazy to read the above)

If you want to and can DIY, research and choose the few stocks you are convinced with
If you don't, leave it to the experts, Find a good financial advisor. Do not invest blindly.

The battle of "How to lose weight"

Losing weight is a battle

It is so easy to gain weight, but so hard to lose weight.

I have gained at least 10kg after giving birth to my beautiful girls, and maybe 5 more after wedding. So it is a whopping 15 kg from my wedding photo time.

I did not seriously try to lose weight in the past... as I am rather happy with myself and thought that I can always try to lose more next time... but the "next time" never came, and I think my weight is now in an unhealthy zone, and I do not look as slim as before... BUT, I still did not take any action until the unfortunate situation that happened a few months back, that I finally decide I should do something!

SO the battle with weight starts.

Why is losing weight so difficult?
I googled it : http://www.sparkpeople.com/blog/blog.asp?post=8_reasons_why_youre_not_losing_weight

My 3 reasons Why losing weight is a battle

1) We have to battle with our determination to start moving. 
Newton's First Law is one of the most powerful law in the universe. An object at rest stays at rest and an object in motion stays in motion with the same speed and in the same direction unless acted upon by an unbalanced force. 

We do know that exercise is a key important reason to lose weight. We will not only lose some calories when we exercise, we will also have a healthier body when we exercise. But to start a regular, sustainable and enjoyable exercise regime is SO difficult. The key word is "enjoyable". Because if you do not enjoy the activity, it is unlikely you can do it for long and reap the health benefits, and also it might result in mental stress which will eventually result in more food intake....

2) We have to battle with our mind to fight off hunger
Yes, mathematically eating less, will result in negative calorie and should result in weight loss. But, time and time again, when I thought I ate very little and eat healthier food I should weigh lesser, the weighing scale will tell me another story. 

You may think that hunger is a natural reaction. When we are hungry, our body is telling us we need food, we should eat. But, our body is a magically irritating system that will just follow a clock. If you have a habit of eating supper, every night you will feel hungry and will need to eat. If you have a habit of eating tea-break, once the clock strike 3pm your stomach will start growling. Are you really hungry? 

Losing weight is an uphill battle to fight against the old bad habits and establishing good ones. 

It is the same with cravings. Do I really need the ice cream treat after my run, because I ran? Do I really need the coke because weather is so hot? Or do I really need the llao llao's Sanum because I need to have the smooth froyo with the crunchy caramelized biscuits, fresh sweet fruits and rafflellao sauce ???  I love food, I really enjoy having good food, but sadly most good food comes with fattening calories.....

3) We have to battle with our body system
Our body, as I mentioned, is a magically irritating system. Also applying the Newton's first law, it likes to stay "balanced" 

If you eat very little to lose weight, our body will adjust our metabolism rate to a lower rate, so we can "survive" and burn less calories. If we work very hard and exercise, our body will make us feel more hungry to compensate for the loss of energy. IF we exercise the same way and have the same diet for a period of time, our body will get used to it and find the balance to maintain the same weight. 

So, key to lose weight is actually try to outsmart and cheat our body.
eg, eat high fibrous food or maybe more protein so we feel full for longer period? Interval training, and rotating different kinds of exercise? Controlling our mind so we do not crave for certain kind of fattening food and just eat healthy food?

I have no idea how to do that... 

Goodbye.... I am going Japan

On Mon, I went to do facial. I thought I deserve a relaxing and pampering facial after the week long ordeal. When the therapist off the lights to start my spa faicial, I almost regret it. Darkness is not suitable for my mood, I felt like crying. Of course, I felt refresh and look radiant after the facial. I know it is time to say goodbye, to my baby whom I have nv met. I have not even heard or saw ur hearttbeat, I have to say goodbye to you....

I am glad this japan trip is already planned in advance. I can take this opportunity to let go and let life go back to normal.., maybe exercise or start a new life after this holiday.

Bye bye
My baby.

一个伟人的离去和我的第一滴眼泪

李光耀先生去世了。

这一星期，举国哀悼。我们难得如此团结。一起排队好几小时只为能在那棺材前鞠个躬。电视洗脑般地不断播李先生有关的纪录片，报道，演讲等等。社交网站充斥着所有人对他的感谢，感想，感念。只要有人，稍稍的的没有"只在赞颂"他，就被架上"忘恩负义"或"不尊重逝者"的标签，被唾弃，被咒骂。

这星期以来，我尽量保持沉默。我没有去排队，我没有为他哭。我甚至怀疑自己，是不是变得冷血了? 可是我没有办法欺骗自己的感觉。我尊重他，但不崇拜他。我欣赏他，但不喜欢他。

看着新闻播送国人为他冒雨送殡，从小孩到老人，不少都是痛哭流涕，很难不感动。让我想起在某个纪录片看到中国人在毛泽东去世时的画面。毛泽东如李先生，也是一代领袖，伟人。他们也一样的富争议性。有人说，一个伟人的功与过在他死后就会一目了然。这么多人为他的离去而伤心，无可厚非李先生自然是功多于过。

乱世出英雄。第二次世界大战后，在新加坡这个小国幸运地出现了李光耀先生这位英雄。英雄带给我们这个岛国安定与繁荣。是物极必反吗? 还是和久必分，分久必和? 几乎所有优秀的领袖，如康熙，如唐太宗，如秦始皇，都间接导致一代皇朝兴盛后灭亡。在乱世中以强势手段排除异己，以义无反顾的决心推动经济发展。背后的代价是什么?在繁荣昌盛的高楼下，被埋进地底的牺牲是什么?

在李先生才刚入土为安，一名17岁的小孩因为上载一片名为"李光耀终于死了" 的视频被捕。他用偏激但流利的言语，抨击李光耀为独裁者。许多人，尤其是像我一样是为人父母的都问，这个小孩怎么会变成这样? 他的抨击，和许多国外报章如出一辙地批评李先生是独裁者，是民主伪君子等。这是崇洋教育的后遗症吗?如果从小父母有教导他礼义廉耻，尊师重道，他应该不会这样?也许，如他小时候演的梁志强导的"小孩不坏"一样，他的父母忙于"建设祖国"，而没有陪伴他的成长岁月?

我刚读一篇文章 ，流下第一滴"看李光耀有关的文章后"的眼泪。我突然领悟，为什么我上星期哭不出来。我没有办法撇开我对所有人对他的赞颂的一点点怀疑。那些问题明明都还在。李先生在他那时做了他必须做的决定。可是套Cinderella 说的 "Just because It's what's done, doesn't mean it's what it should be done". 在他离世后，我们是不是更应该检讨有什么是应该改进的，有什么可以做得更好的，怎样能让我们的国家更好? 而不是一味地赞颂他曾经为国家做了什么。让新加坡更好，应该也是他想看到的吧。

让我流那第一滴眼泪的文章:
http://thecrazyangmoandhisangrywife.blogspot.sg/2015/03/the-harder-truth.html