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Friday, September 5, 2014

breastfeeding... again

i saw an article recently about how breastfeeding could harm baby.  Couldn't find the exact article again,  but here is a similar one http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/mother-tongue/10911177/Breastfeeding-wars-is-breast-really-best.html

"Breast is good"
I heard this from my friends too , from the pre natal class, and hospital too,  when I was first pregnant with wl. But Breastfeeding is nv easy; engorgement is nightmare , pumping is depressing, nipple sores is the worst pain besides labour contraction, leaking milk is also one of the worst embarassing thing I have to face, smelling like milk ALL the time, wearing ugly pumping/latching friendly clothes and being mistaken to be pregnant is also quite unbearable. on top of this , u get questioned by stranger aunties all the time, "what ? U din feed formula even at night? Are u sure ur baby had enough milk? " Its also all those famous actress fault who made child bearing seems so effortless, they breastfeed, get back to shape super fast,  and still look glamorous all the time. How did they manage to do it?

Despite all these I still manage to breastfeed wl exclusively for a year plus. to be honest,  I am also very proud to say that my baby is exclusively breastfed whenever I was asked. Its like saying "yes,  I am a strong mum who overcome all obstacles and pre-judgement and pressure, I gave my baby MY milk!"
(Actually its because wl refused bottle! I was kinda forced to breastfeed, haha)  

I guess there is always two sides to a coin, equal stress will be felt for those mums who can't breastfeed their babies successfully. Its hard to not feel guilty if u can't provide enough milk for ur baby. Small little things like indulging in unhealthy snacks (in turn might result unhealthy milk for my baby) can make me feel guilty already! And ppl nowadays are so self-righteous that they always wanna talk down to strangers as if they know it all. Look at how xiaxue is being scrutinize on every single way she raise dash on her social media. They say "mummy know the best" , so can strangers please shut up?

However, I think it is unfair to blame breastfeeding for causing mum's to get post-Natal depression. And breastfeeding for causing jaundice in baby. It is common for new born to have jaundice and there is also differentiation between breastfeeding jaundice and breast milk jaundice.

Both my girls had jaundice when they are newborn,  although wl is more serious than yl. My milk supply came in earlier for yl too (maybe coz she's second child, my breast is 'seasoned', Or maybe we had very long skin to skin time right after birth coz my room is not ready) but even so, lactation consultant was ard for both to make sure there was proper latch and everything is fine. And the nurse did supplement wl with formula for the initial period when milk is not enuf. .. it didn't help to bring down her jaundice level.

Anyways , I just want to say mothers all need great support to whichever decisions they make.  And most importantly, mothers must feel happy for child to be happy too! So , do not give mothers unnecessary stress and opinions. Also, mothers should always seek opinion from professional when in doubt.  ;)

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

不要恋爱,要结婚

现在追看的韩剧叫:"不要恋爱要结婚。"

故事是说一个过份热心向往结婚的女人和一个过份冷淡拒绝结婚的男人之间的爱情故事。
男人为了避免家人再安排相亲随便找了一个女人假恋爱,却被女人的一股傻劲和真心吸引,竟然爱上她。女人本来只是答应演戏,却付出太多真心。

"爱情在闭上嘴的那一刻就结束了" 女主角的妈妈这样说。

有時我们怕 打扰对方,忍住一句关心的问候。有时因为太生气而不想说。在不问不说的那一刻后,也许以后再也没办法说了。没有了沟通,爱情也就没有了。相爱相处的两个人若没法诚实的告诉对方自己的想法,要如何爱,如何相处呢?


Tuesday, August 19, 2014

我和琬玲的第一通电话

我: 喂
琬玲: 是妈妈吗?
我: 是,是妈妈啊
琬玲: 妈妈! 妈妈!! 妈妈!!!
我: 琬玲乖吗?
琬玲: 妈妈!!! 妈妈!!!! 妈妈!!!!!
我: 琬玲吃饱了吗?
琬玲: 我吃了
我: 冲凉了吗?
琬玲: 我冲凉了。
我: 妈妈在吃饭,吃饱了就去找你。
琬玲: 哦。 yeah!!! 好,拜拜!
我: 拜拜!

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

How l hope l can spend my weekends.

Wake up at 7am, and think it's just 7am and sleep some more, cuddle a bit with hubby..
Finally open my eyes at 10am, browse my facebook and play Candycrush till I finish all my lives on my comfy bed..
Finally jump off bed feeling happy and excited, then skipped to the hippest cafe in town for a cool brunch.
Enjoy pretty food and latte-art Coffee while I try to take yummy looking food to post on my instagram , then enjoy best friends' company at the cafe, sharing the latest gossips.
It is a great day with nice weather, go swimming with hubby before dinner.
It's dinner time with family. Weekend is best with home cooked food (cooked by my mummy)
TV time with family in the evening.
9pm, go late nightmovie With my lovely hubby.
Ends the day with supper at the market, what is weekend without satay / fried hokken mee or Punggol nasi lemaK ?
How l actually spend my weekend
6am: Woke up by MM, probably the third time since last night? I can't really remember . Dream feed= l feed mm in my dreams. (or while sleepwalking)
7am: Woke up again because gg cry coz she dun see me lying beside her when she peep in her sleep. Couldn't figure out how she manage to do that...
7.30am: finally comforted gg and get ready for breakfast.
8am: Breakfast is noodle soup share with gg. Din really know how 'it taste like Or remember if I did eat anything, because my focus is to feed gg her noodles and feed mm cereal at The same time. "Brain rules' is right, our brain is not wired to multitask.
9am: Running after naked gg to go into toilet for shower.
10.30am: Finally both princesses are cleaned and dressed. I try to shower quickly and get ready to go out for lunch. No time to dress up, I think I look Ok la, most importantly top is nursing accessible, whole day outside dunno when and where have to feed MM. (It's lunch time already?!?)
1130am: We are early for friends lunch gathering (actually is my friends are late for our brunch gathering) , so brought gg to play at the mall's children play area. In between, checked out the new malls' nursing room which is elephant big, and try to nurse fussy mm.....
1 pm: when gg is finally warmed up to play at the new playground, Our friends arrived for lunch ( or breakfast for my friends)
2.30pm: managed to survive lunch with mm crying and sleeping intermittently ,  friends have not seen each other for a long time so we decide to have Some coffee and dessert to catchup some more.
3pm: finally settled down at a new hipster cafe with young people, MM started to be cranky and husband need to carry her walk ard the mall.
3.30pm It's gg turn to be cranky because she missed her usual nap time which is 2 and half hours ago.
4pm hastily ended coffee session and apologized to friends for my cranky babies. We parted and promised to meet again real soon. (which probably will not happen anytime soon unless we all forget abt today's drama )
5pm: still in car because both kids are sleeping like angels in their car seat.
6.30pm: At parents home for dinner. It's a blessing to have other family members to entertain gg and carry mm.
8pm: Shower both kids and get ready to go home.
9pm: Home sweet home. Can't wait to go to my comfy bed. But gg refused to sleep. Luckily mm feel asleep In her car seat whole travelling home.
10pm: After acceding to gg countless request such as "l want milk" "No, I want Milk in hello kitty bottle" "I want星星" ( the graduate puff) , "l want Dora" (Watch her favorite cartoon Dora)  etc.
11pm: (or so) I am already asleep before gg sleep. Thank goodness the husband is awake to entertain her)
12pm: (or so) Mm crying for milk... it's another day already....
disclaimer: Above is probably an exagerated illustration of some of the worst seenario I had during weekend, which happens rather frequently. 
Parenting comes with challenges and sacrifices. Though endless and repeating drama makes me feel exhausted most of the time. nothing can replace the joy of seeing the girls smile , learning new things and growing up.

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

文化遗产

最近有个展览,主题是"消失的华校,国家永远的资产"。有位我认识的华文老师积极向周围的朋友宣扬,顺便炫耀她的母校有多少杰出人才。我听了嗤之以鼻。

几个月前我还问那位老师,你怎么不和你的孙子说方言呢,好让你的孙子也会说方言?她那时的回答是,"方言没有任何价值,学来做什么?" 我怎么也没想到华文老师会对方言有这样的评价,可我也不会说方言所以也不好意说什么只能默默换话题。几个月后说方言没有任何价值的人竟然跟我说消失的华校是国家的资产???

1) 消失的东西已经不存在了,还能称上是资产?
2) 还没消失的文化都被称为没有价值,已经消失的东西你说是资产?!
3) 如今被当成资产的华校不就是和方言一样,以让国家经济繁荣为由喝令被铲除的吗?

也许被你因以为傲的所谓的资产的是那些在各个领域获得成就的校友,而不是华人五千年的文化遗产,不是那些热血沸腾的知识分子所奋斗的新世界,不是那些默默耕耘的小人物为更美好生活团结一起的勇气与良心 。

Thursday, July 17, 2014

Being a cow

The thing I hate most about being a mum who choose to breastfeed my baby is I have to pump milk!

One hr every 3-4hr a day= 6hr a day spend to get the milk out, almost equal to the time I slp a day! And the wOrse thing is,  I spend so much time a day only able to keep up with the demand.... I feel like a cow!

I need more milk to be milked out to go holiday! !!!! (And still need to milk when I am on holiday! )

Thursday, July 10, 2014

The day has come

This is it, the day we have been waiting for, the maid is here, or will be here.

At this juncture, I dun even know how to pronounce her name... and this person, pray that she'll be a good person, will be staying at our house rather permanently. Everything will be different from now on.

Am I prepared for it?

Language barrier
I have downloaded the app for translation. Its pretty amazing, u can just speak to it and it'll translate it to the language you selected.

Work schedule
All planned out in my notebook, temporary timetable drawn too.

Working environment
Camera not installed yet, but should be ok ... do it b4 xl go overseas next mth.
Her room not ready too, guess have to ask her pack up a bit, maybe buy bed tog with us after tt....

Ok I guess I am not too ready....

OMG!

Update: The previous maid had to be sent home as she did not pass her medical examination (sort of). We finally chose again... Waiting again...
As of 23 August