First Christmas with baby at hospital

I am now lying on the hospital bed, waiting for the feeding time. Baby had high jaundice level and is not allowed to go home. Spending Christmas in hospital is not something i have expected, especially this is the 1St Christmas with baby. Last night we countdown while feeding baby at the breastfeeding room. Luckily baby got hungry in the day and feeding time changed such that the precious half hr we can visit baby to feed her coincide with the 'countdown. we had a cosy time singing our favorites Christmas songs to her while encouraging her to stay awake to drink more milk. Xl say he saw the change in me. He say I am extremely patient with baby and can do anything for her. I was surprise myself too, how I survived a day alone with her on the second day at hospital plus coping with the visitors, and how I cried uncontrollably when I saw the goggles mark on her face the first time I feed her after she was taken away for her photo-therapy. Honestly I am still not used to the idea that I am already a mother. I guess it is instinct that made me do all I did last few days. Sometimes when friends and family commented baby is very cute, I wonder why I do not felt the same way. I am just focused on fulfilling her needs, instead of her looks. the feeling I have for her is so different from the love I have for anyone. It's so natural, attached and unique, like she is a part of me yet a separate individual. I wonder if I am going to be a good mother, and will she grow up to be a fine lady and have a good life? This seems to be a long journey, I pray that everything will be fine and we can go home today.