After an hour plus of squeezing and pumping, this is all i got.... i tried to comfort myself, maybe its because i did not drink enough water, maybe its because i am hungry...but i know, my breastfeeding career is coming to an end. After falling sick, both me and baby consecutively for a few times, after the sydney trip, after my period came... its imminent that my supply has dropped and is not coming back... i did not try hard enough too.. its just too tiring. I know its coming and planning for it to happen, but when the reality hit hard i still couldnt take it. I sat down in the nursing room alone and cried. I have failed, failed to perservere to a full year, i have been selfish and only thought about myself. I cried, because this is the final end. No more holding baby in my arms, close to me at my breast and my heart. This is the end, the final end of my breastfeeding career.
1 comment:
hugs dear.. my dear, the best gift we can give to our kids is love and time. Not milk la.. at least this is what i feel.. if it's too tiring, i rather you rest and have more energy to love and play with them after that, then spend time with the machine.. we are mothers, not cows.. so you don't need to feel overly guilty over this. If one spends 3 yrs pumping and feeding breastmilk to her kid, but has no time to spend with the child, then what is the point? The child will only remember moments we spend with them not how long we bf/pump... love ya..
- lena
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